From the Styx by Peggy Tibbetts

Orwell called it newspeak. We know them as talking points. Lately the newspeak talking points are coming at us in a steady stream.

This month’s award goes to Columnist Jack Kelly for sticking Rep. John Murtha and the Democrats with the term slow bleed.

The following article by Robert Dietz at Media Matters shows the origins of talking point – slow bleed – by Republicans, led by the Bush Administration, and fueled by the media.

Jack Kelly column repeats “slow bleed” rhetoric, results of dismissed poll

In a February 25 column, Toledo Blade and Pittsburgh Post-Gazette national security writer Jack Kelly repeatedly suggested that Rep. John P. Murtha (D-PA) had “outlined” a “slow bleed” strategy for dealing with the administration on Iraq without noting that the term “slow bleed” was invented by the media, has been promoted by the Republican Party, and is not used by Democrats, as Media Matters for America has noted (here, here, here, and here). In the column, which bore the sub-headline, “A ’slow bleed’ strategy to stop the surge probably would backfire on the Democrats,” Kelly wrote:

“So the Democrats may adopt what’s been called the ’slow bleed’ strategy. Rep. Jack Murtha, D-Johnstown, outlined it last week in an interview with the left wing Web site MoveCongress.org. The strategy would be to impose, through amendments to the defense appropriations bill, so many restrictions on U.S. troops that the president’s plan for a surge would be hamstrung.”

In other words, even though the media says the Democrats plan to pursue a slow bleed strategy in Iraq, it’s simply not true. No Democrat ever really used the term slow bleed.

Slow bleed was concocted and spread around to make the Democrats look bad. But I’m not exactly sure why the Republicans expend so much time and effort on that anymore. The Democrats do a pretty good job all by themselves.

Click here to add From the Styx to your RSS reader.

Yip-pee!

Ya-hoo!

And once more just for good measure – 

Nyah-nyah nyah-nyah nyah!

The Board of Trustees and Garfield County are in a pissing contest and River Park is caught in the middle.

Yesterday – February 26 – the Trustees received the following letter from Fred Jarman, Director of Garfield County Building and Planning Dept:

“Garfield County received a copy of Resolution No. 7, Series of 2007 regarding the proposed River Park Annexation from the Town of Silt (the Town) on January 29th, 2007. Colorado Revised Statute § 31-12-108.5 requires municipalities to submit an annexation impact report or formally request that the Board of County Commissioners waive the requirement for all annexations greater than ten acres in size.

“Garfield County did not receive an annexation impact report or a request to waive this requirement. This report is required by state statute to be completed by the municipality at least twenty-five days before the public hearing. The municipality shall also file one copy with the Board of County Commissioners within five days thereafter. Not fulfilling this requirement of the Colorado Revised Statute has resulted in the inability of Garfield County staff to review the required report in order to determine possible impacts of the proposed annexation.

“The proposed annexation is not in compliance with Colorado Revised Statue § 31-12-108.5. The absence of the required impact report or a formal request from the Town to waive this requirement has resulted in what the County finds as an incomplete annexation petition. If approved, the non-compliant annexation will not be recognized by Garfield County.”

What does this mean?

The Town has to formally request a waiver or file the required impact report. Therefore the annexation is on hold until that report is either waived or filed with the County, which could take anywhere from 2-6 weeks. Then the annexation process must start all over.

Remember, the Town is suing Garfield County over road maintenance and Stillwater annexation. I don’t necessarily know what this something has to do with anything. I’m just saying while in and of itself the lawsuit probably creates some friction between the two, this month The Mayor aired his grievances with the County publicly in The Paper and in a letter to County Commissioners. Perhaps some people didn’t take too kindly to his complaints. So it’s pretty clear Hizzonor did step in the goo of his own making.

It’s all so ironic. Because now his blatherings work to my advantage, allowing my petition more time, and to the River Park Peeps, because any delay favors our cause.

Mwah-ha-ha ha-ha …

The lesson for the day is local governments are supposed to work together to solve problems. Process. Negotiation. Cooperation. Not in court. Or The Paper. Or unilaterally by one individual.

We all need each other at some point.

Click here to add From the Styx to your RSS reader.

Before Silt voters passed Home Rule last November, a brand new Charter was written. Two of the current Trustees even participated in writing the new Charter. So anyway, last night Tod and I pulled out his copy and turned to Section 6-7 about Petitions.

Here’s what it says:

When a referendum petition is filed with the Town Clerk, the ordinance sought to be reconsidered shall be suspended …

Meaning they CAN’T talk about the ordinance because a petition has been filed. With all due respect, I’ll simply say:

Nyah-nyah nyah-nyah-nyah

The next Board of Trustees meeting is Monday, 2/26. River Park annexation finding of fact is 2nd to last on the Agenda. All that will happen is that the staff will go over the title and details (those details will not include usage) and the Board will likely pass the finding of fact to the next phase which is the actual annexation ordinance, which may or may not be on the Agenda for the March 12 meeting. An ordinance requires 2 public hearings so if people want to comment on it, then those are good opportunities. I will post updates here about the hearings as they are scheduled.

I’m not going to this Monday’s meeting. With the annexation so far out on the Agenda, it’s possible they won’t get to it and if they do it will be around 9:30 or 10 pm. I feel confident now that the Home Rule Charter prohibits Board discussion about park usage while the petition is circulating.

It’s Girl Scout cookie time! Remember when I said I’ll latch onto a Girl Scout and follow her around town? Well, my neighbor June Zeinstra is the local Girl Scout leader. Every year she and the Scouts sell cookies at the 4 corners in Silt. So last evening I teamed up with June and the girls downtown and collected 13 signatures. The cookies brought em in and I chased down the Silt voters. Worked like a charm. The girls were excited because they all go to River Park with their dogs. And they sold a TON of cookies. Since I was a Girl Scout and a Brownie Leader – once a Girl Scout always a Girl Scout I guess – it’s a comfortable partnership. June will let me know when they’ll be selling downtown again and I’ll go hang with them and collect more signatures. Only 13 more to my goal … 

Support the Girl Scouts of America. Buy cookies!

Click here to add From the Styx to your RSS reader.

A little bird told me that the Dog Park issue may be decided without regard for the petition. The Board wants to determine River Park’s use right after annexation in order to avoid potential dog-related litigation, probably in 60-90 days.

How interesting! I don’t know exactly WHO said it, only that “some people were talking”.

Oo-oo! I love that. It’s so FOX News-ish. Some people say …

Isn’t this fun?

Because of how I heard about it – via email – it seems obvious the rumor was intended for my ears – or eyes.

I asked Tod – since he’s on the Board and all – and he didn’t know a thing about it. Gosh. I sure hope that doesn’t mean OTHER Trustees are discussing the River Park issue and making decisions outside public meetings. They would NEVER do something like that. No.

Because if they did, somebody might find out about it and raise a stink about the Colorado Sunshine Law. And they wouldn’t want THAT hanging over their heads.

Potential dog-related litigation.

What is that? Perhaps this whole petition thing amounts to wrong-thinking on my part. Maybe instead we should’ve formed a class-action lawsuit on behalf of the DOGS.

The truth is, there is no there there. Potential dog-related litigation is a non-issue.

That’s like saying if I walk down the street and a dog runs out and bites me, I can sue the town.

That’s like saying if river rafters or fisherman that use River Park get injured, they can sue the town.

That’s like saying if a kid gets hurt playing soccer in a Silt Park, his parents can sue the town.

If that’s the case then they’d better close ALL the parks and while they’re at it take out all the playground equipment to avoid any potential monkey bars-related litigation.

Last December, Tod and I met with Rick Aluise (Town Mgr), Silt Police Chief Paul Taylor, and Pamela Barber (Town Atty) and they said there is NO POTENTIAL FOR DOG-RELATED LITIGATION. The town is not liable. Period.

There was a brief discussion by Trustees last November about putting up a sign. If that’s what it takes to appease those who are worried about liability, then so be it. I haven’t taken a position on sign-age. The Trustees can battle that out. It doesn’t matter.

According to Rick Aluise, the annexation process requires at least 3 more meetings. So the first possible opportunity for a discussion about River Park use would be March 26 – even sooner than 60-90 days. I hope to have the petition turned in before then. But I’m not sure.

As I’ve probably mentioned I do have 6 MONTHS to collect signatures. That’s part of the petition process outlined in the Silt Town Charter.

The reality is the petition signers must be residents of Silt who are registered voters. I can talk to 20 people and get 5 signatures. Finding eligible signers takes as long as it takes. I’m not complaining. I just think I should be allowed to gather signatures without the threat of pre-emptive strikes by the Trustees hanging over my head.

A game of Gotcha over River Park is a really bad idea. 

Since last November when The Mayor brought up dogs at River Park, I have followed procedures. My letters, verbal comments, meetings, the petition, and even my blog have always been respectful of the process.

I wonder why that same respect is not being shown to me, the petition, the petition signers, and all the people who have written letters and spoken out on behalf of the dogs at River Park.

Since there is no pending litigation or any emergency relating to the status of dogs at River Park, what’s the big damn hurry?

I think it says a lot about any Trustee who wants to make decisions before the people can be fully heard. It says that Trustee represents his own interests, and not the people of Silt.

While I DON’T understand the disrespect for the people – since the Trustees are elected officials and all – I DO GET the message. Some Trustees feel threatened by the people’s participation in the process.

So bite me.

BTW, just for laughs go to My Space and read my latest blog entry, If I was President …
Scroll down the page and check out my book slider while you’re there.

Click here to add From the Styx to your RSS reader.
 

The Paper proves once again they can make news out of absolutely nothing. I’ve got to hand it to them, they sure do fill up a lot of column inches with not necessarily news.

In this week’s episode of Silly Little Silt: Toll Booths Part 2, The Paper reports what they should’ve reported last week. Silt toll booths are all talk.

Silt toll booths: For now it’s only talk
Decision postponed until completion of impact analysis
By John Gardner

SILT - Silt Mayor David Moore’s idea of toll booths coming to Silt has sparked a lot of conversation.

So much conversation that Town Council held an emergency workshop Tuesday night at Town Hall to discuss the options available on how to pay for damages done to Silt’s roads by commercial industries.

“I’ve received a lot of feedback on the issue,” Moore said. “And now people are thinking that maybe we’ve (Silt) got problems, too, and that something needs to be done.”

The discussion began with the approval of the Grand River Gravel Pit by the Garfield County Planning and Zoning Commission. The pit, which would be located just south of Silt, is still awaiting approval by the Garfield County commissioners, though that is expected to come some time in April.

The discussion now is how much physical damage will be done to Silt’s infrastructure; what the sociological impacts will be to police, ambulance, fire and health; and what to expect in terms of environmental impacts, such as noise, pollution and air and water quality. Other impacts, like land use violations and property devaluation of and around Silt, were brought up by Moore as well.

Town Council is awaiting an analysis report analyzing the gravel pits’ magnitude of impact.

Until then, the discussion is open.

“Until the analysis update of the general impact comes back, it’s just discussion,” said Silt Town Administrator Rick Aluise. “By state statute nothing can be done until the analysis comes back.”

And the discussion thickens.

“When we get that (analysis) we’ll be able to judge how much money it will take (to maintain the roads) and how we’ll get it,” Moore said.

Aluise mentioned that for the toll booths to be effective, Silt would need seven or eight booths in strategic places to ensure that all who use the roads, considered town roads, are paying the proposed fee.

The total estimated cost of installing the booths would be approximately $66,000, according to Moore’s preliminary calculations. But according to Moore, the booths will pay for themselves, and then some. At Moore’s estimated rate of $2 per truck using the roads, that would add up to around $412,000 in revenue per year.

Other options discussed by Town Council were: licensing of trucks; access fees; an electronic toll booth to work in conjunction with the oil and gas and gravel pit trucks that use the roads; or bookkeeping and billing, where all companies would be required to provide the town with proof of receipts and records concerning their use of the roads, and they then would be billed accordingly.

So until the road impact analysis comes in, it’s all going to be talk. The main point is to ensure that those who are using the roads commercially and causing damage to the roads are paying for it besides sticking the taxpayers with it.

“At least we’ve got people talking,” Moore said.

Yup. People are talking all right. With the River Park Petition (53 signatures so far!) I’ve been out talking to A LOT of people. Many more than 53 because not everyone I talk to can sign the petition – either they’re not registered voters or they live outside city limits. And I talk to the River Park Peeps all the time. Hizzonor’s right. The people ARE talking. The people do think Silt has problems. The people think Silt’s biggest problem is THE MAYOR. The people think he makes Silt look silly.

Here are some of the comments I hear:

“The Mayor acts like he’s running a homeowners’ association.”

“The Mayor talks to reporters like he’s the one making the decisions. That’s not how it works.”

“Who voted for him? I sure as hell didn’t!”

“The Mayor gets everyone all excited about toll booths, and the whole point about the mess our roads are in gets lost in the fray.”

“Why would anyone want to do business in Silt? Especially when The Mayor airs his negative opinions in The Paper instead of negotiating in good faith with the rest of the Board.”

“The Paper just uses him to make fun of Silt.”

The people think Silt’s roads are a mess. The people think Silt’s growing too fast. The people want a grocery store. The people want a bank. The people worry about air and water pollution from gas well drilling. The Mayor and the Board have a low approval rating. Really low.

It’s also true the people are fed up with governments and politicians in general. So that trickles down to local government and politicians. But now it’s more important than ever for local government and politicians to be aware of the people’s dissatisfaction and work toward positive solutions. Instead of pissing them off even more.

Click here to add From the Styx to your RSS reader.

Last Friday, Hizzonor stepped in it again. He held a Town Meeting of One in The Paper. But why should he have all the fun and get all the attention? This is simply irresistible. I just HAVE to jump into the fray.

A toll booth to pay for gravel pit impacts?
By Heidi Rice

SILT - Installing a toll booth on the town’s roads is just one suggestion that has come up in response to the Garfield County’s Planning and Zoning Commission’s recent approval of a gravel pit near Silt.

The idea of a toll booth, suggested by Mayor Dave Moore, would be to help offset the impacts to Silt’s roads.

What? A toll booth? When did this come up? And where was it suggested? In the Mayor’s brain? Did he just then suggest it to The Paper? Or maybe to his wife? And then she called The Paper?

The people are totally confused.

A little context would be helpful here. I happen to know that “toll booth” came up at a recent Board of Trustees Meeting, in a discussion that included a whole host of options to deal with funding road maintenance. To make “toll booth” the focus of the article is to take it out of context. And make Silt look ridiculous.

Moore said he is calling an emergency workshop prior to the town’s next meeting on Feb. 12 to discuss the matter.

“I’m extremely concerned about who is going to pay for the roads, infrastructure and the bridges that will be impacted, along with the sociological impacts to the police department, ambulance, fire department and all other unforeseen challenges and expenses that come out,” Moore said.

The county P&Z approved the application for the Grand River Park gravel pit project on Jan. 16. The pit is owned by a group of notable Glenwood Springs attorneys and contractors, including water lawyer Scott Balcomb and contractors Dick Stephenson and Gregg Rippy. The 168-acre gravel pit south of Silt will be operated by Bill Roberts, owner of Earthworks Construction and Western Slope Aggregates, which runs a gravel pit in Carbondale.

P&Z members approved the application with a long laundry list of conditions that include an extensive reclamation plan, sharing the cost of damages to County Road 346 and inspection of the property by the county.

However, Moore wanted the commission to deny the project and send it back to the town of Silt for renegotiation and to see how the costs of the impacts can be recouped by the town.

It’s true. The people REALLY ARE concerned about the new gravel pit south of town. And it certainly would’ve been ideal if the county P&Z had sent the owners back to Silt. But they didn’t. As with all things governmental there is a long, slow process that takes place. Of course Hizzonor can say anything he damn pleases. But it might be an even better idea to work through the process before he shoots off his mouth.

Holding a Town Meeting of One in The Paper hardly seems like the most diplomatic or democratic approach to the process. But hey, that’s Our Mayor. Full of surprises and apparently, ideas …

Along with the idea of a toll booth, Moore is also suggesting either an access fee or licensing fees.

“But I’m pushing for toll booths,” Moore said. “I want to know what we can do and the way we can tax or get some of these fees. I think politics are involved here. It just doesn’t pass the smell test. If the county doesn’t help us out, we’re going to march to the beat of our own drummer.”

Toll booths? Access fee? Licensing fees? Taxes?

Uh-oh, do I hear the sound of a drumbeat?

So who crowned him King? And a grumpy one at that!

Yes, he’s definitely marching to the beat of his own drummer. I just wish he’d leave the rest of us out of it cuz at this point I don’t know WHAT THE HELL he’s talking about.

Ok, I get that he’s mad that the county P&Z approved the gravel pit. Though it does bring to mind the schoolyard bully stomping his foot. Boy-I’m-so-mad-I-oughta-pop-you-one-or-poke-a-stick-in-your-eye-but-I’ll-get-you-for-this.

It’s a hell of a way to do business. And it’s not his business to do. We have a Town Manager and Board of Trustees who together participate in research, discussion, hearings, and motions. That whole PROCESS thing.

Subverting the process serves no purpose. Helps no one. It just pisses people off

Unfortunately, Mr. Mayor publicly spouting retaliation for the county P&Z’s approval of the gravel pit accomplishes all of the above.

Garfield County Commissioner Trési Houpt said the gravel pit project application has not yet been before the commission and probably wouldn’t until sometime in April.

“It’s very important that we hear everyone’s concern and from what I’ve heard, (Moore) felt he didn’t have adequate time to be heard,” Houpt said. “I’ll be looking at everything. There are regulations in place and we’ll be looking at impacts and litigation and everything else that goes into approving that kind of application.”

When asked about the prospects of a toll booth, Houpt said that the town of Silt would also need to look at the costs of putting that in place.

“I believe we have a process in place that allows everyone to share their concerns and I hope (Moore) is there to share his concerns,” Houpt said. “It’s not a done deal. It’s a long process, but I think that’s good.”

Thank you for bringing some sanity to the Town Meeting of One, Commisioner Houpt. It’s good to be reminded again that this is a PROCESS.

Silt’s emergency workshop to discuss its options is scheduled from 6 to 7 p.m. on Feb. 12 at Silt Town Hall.

What was the emergency again? Oh, that’s right. Subverting the process. Retaliation options.

To further fuel the Humor Mill, The Paper is running a poll: Do you think toll booths should be used in the Silt area?

It’s still running! As of today, “Are you kidding me?” wins hands down with almost 67% of 181 votes.

Silly little Silt.

Well this is another fine mess you’ve gotten us into, Mr. Mayor.

The concerns about the gravel pit – “who is going to pay for the roads, infrastructure and the bridges that will be impacted, along with the sociological impacts to the police department, ambulance, fire department and all other unforeseen challenges and expenses that come out” – they are all serious issues. But how they are resolved is not the Mayor’s decision to make. 

George H.W. Bush said it best: “Would you please shut up and sit down!”

Click here to add From the Styx to your RSS reader.

My very first publisher was the notorious Martha Ivery of Press-TIGE Publishing. I never understood what was up with the TIGE part in caps. I mean the name defines irony. She and her company turned out to be anything BUT pres-TIGIOUS. Martha was The Worst Publisher On Earth. Last month she headed to the slammer for 65 months.

If you have never heard of Martha Ivery, you can read the juicy details here:
Multiple Personalities – Fee-Charging Literary Agent/Fraudulent Vanity Publisher Martha Ivery, a.k.a. Kelly O’Donnell

I’ve been thinking about Martha a lot lately. To commemorate her incarceration I composed a parody of the Beatles song, “Martha My Dear” – with my apologies to John Lennon and Paul McCartney. You already know the tune, so hum along.

Martha My Dear

(piano intro)

Martha my dear
Though I spent my days in isolation, you
discovered me
Martha you con, won’t forget you
Martha my dear

Hang your head down, you crazy bitch
Look what you’ve done
When you found yourself in the thick of it
Helped yourself to the dreams of writers all around you
Crazy bitch

Take a good look around you
Take a good look and you’re bound to see
That prison bars were meant to be
your destiny
Crazy bitch

(orchestral interlude)

Scammed the writers, you crazy bitch
See what you’ve done
When you found yourself in the thick of it
Helped yourself to the dreams of writers all around you
Crazy bitch

Martha my dear, you were always my exasperation, but
you believed in me
Martha my bitch
Won’t forget you
Martha my dear

I don’t consider myself a “victim”.  I didn’t pay Martha Ivery to publish my book. In 1996, I signed a standard advance plus royalties contract with Press-TIGE Publishing for “Carly’s Ghost”. I received a $1000 advance.

Martha and I had a strange relationship. But let’s face it, the publishing industry is weird. Exhibit A: Judith Regan (see Even Bitches Have Feelings). ALL my business relationships have been strange. It wasn’t until Tales of Martha spilled out into cyberspace that I glimpsed the depths of her scam-duggery. But when I told my story I didn’t get a warm welcome from the We Hate Martha Ivery Club. I was accused of lying, defending her, even colluding with her. I responded the way any irrational creative person does, I blamed it on addiction and hid out in re-hab.

So to further mar this occasion I’m breaking my silence. Call it – therapy.

When I “met” Kelly O’Donnell (a.k.a. Martha Ivery) in 1995, I was still sputtering from what I had thought was the mother of all scams. A small local publisher had offered to publish “Carly’s Ghost”, but the contract stated I was responsible for some of the production costs “to be determined”. When I refused to sign it, the publisher set out to publish my book anyway and bill me for the costs. Six months and $500-in-legal-fees later I stopped him.

As a parting shot, the publisher called and said, “The contract never would’ve cost you what you paid that lawyer. And you would have your book published by now.” Ok, so he lied.

I found Kelly O’Donnell Literary Agency listed in “Jeff Herman’s Guide to Publishers, Editors, and Literary Agents”. I contacted her through the normal query process. She asked to see “Carly’s Ghost”. After she read it she called and said she loved it and wanted to see more of my work.

She did ask me for $100 up front for “office expenses” but I refused. I told her all about the last publisher’s scam. She didn’t mention the fee again. But then, why would she? That’s probably how she got Her First Big Idea.

She almost got me a deal with Little, Brown – I know this is true because she sent me copies of the correspondences – but it fell through. I’m pretty sure she did nothing else as an agent to sell my work. Which is a good thing. Once I got to know her psychotic bitch persona I understood how she might have blown that one opportunity.

A couple months later she said she had found a small publisher, Press-TIGE Publishing. She insisted that I needed to “come out” with a small press which would get me recognized and get me bigger contracts. She told me the deal they offered for “Carly’s Ghost” – the boilerplate $1000 advance against 10% royalties. Her pitch made sense. She sent me the contract and I signed it. It was also signed by Martha Ivery.

About six months passed and I didn’t hear a thing from Kelly O’Donnell or Martha Ivery. I still thought they were 2 people. I called Kelly to find out what was up. I got her answering machine, except it was Kelly’s voice saying she was Martha Ivery from Press-TIGE Publishing.

I was furious. I left a snarky message that went something like: “You’re fired.”

When she called back I told her to cancel my contract with Press-TIGE. She refused and insisted that I had been paid, and I couldn’t legally back out now, production had already begun … blah, blah, blah. She threatened to sue me for the advance money.

She prattled on about what a talented writer I was and how she believed in me so much she was willing to put her own money on the line so she could get my work noticed. I told her she could not be my agent and she’d better refund her agency fee on my advance. She said she had dissolved her agency. She returned her fee.

I talked to a lawyer. He said I had done the right thing by canceling the agent agreement. But the book contract was legitimate, and since I had been paid the advance money she could come after me for it, even though the contract didn’t say so. “She’s not the most scrupulous person, but on the other hand do you want months of lawyers and legal fees? Or do you want your book published?” he asked. “It says here she will publish your book. That’s legally binding.”

In hind sight, adopting the “wait and see” attitude was probably the cowardly choice. But it required the least effort and expense on my part. Of course that was back in 1997, before she really got strung out. I couldn’t exactly google Martha Ivery to find out what she was up to.

After that, I pestered her with phone calls and emails which usually began with: “When will Carly’s Ghost be published?”

Her excuses were truly madly deeply outrageous.

“I just signed a huge contract with a big name author I can’t name because he demanded confidentiality, so I’ve been totally tied up with that.”

“My husband had a heart attack.”

“I have cancer and I’ve been so sick from chemotherapy.”

I always called bullshit on her. At one point I said, “You have such a tragic life you should write a book.”

“Oh, but I have!” she said and told me all about her book, What’s Your Psychic I.Q.?: How to Listen to Your Inner Voice and Let It Guide You to a Better Life.

I laughed. “Gee, that hasn’t worked out too well for you, has it?”

She dusted off the old cancer chestnut when she first extorted me for money. “The medical bills have wiped out my finances so if you could return the advance, then I can afford to publish your book. I’ll pay you back.”

“I’m not a banker,” I said. “Go get a loan.”

Through the years I figured out that the Martha I knew wasn’t necessarily the same as the Martha – or Kelly, or Joseph – other people knew. Her lies frustrated yet amused me. She seduced me with her praise. So how fucked up is that? Perhaps she connected with my inner masochist.

Martha persisted with the delusion that she was in the process of publishing my book. Cover designs and galleys came and went. Then in 1999, she sent an addendum to the original contract demanding the advance be returned as payment to print “Carly’s Ghost”. I called her and ripped it up over the phone.

“So that’s the thanks I get after I knocked myself out to get your book ready for publication,” she said. “All I need is money for the printing costs. My husband’s been out of work because of his chemotherapy treatments.”

“I thought he had a heart attack,” I said.

“He did. Then we found out he had cancer.”

“So now you both have cancer?”

“Are you calling me a liar?”

“You really need to keep your stories straight.”

“As much as I admire you, Peggy, you are the most cold-hearted person I have ever known.”

“Yes I am.”

I didn’t hear from her again until January 2000. She emailed and said she had a big surprise: “Carly’s Ghost will be released soon.”

But I’d heard that before.

On February 1, 2000, a package arrived. Twenty-five copies of “Carly’s Ghost” printed in paperback. I hated the cover design. She’d made editing changes I had never approved – but – I had this book in my hands – “Carly’s Ghost” – with my name on it. I was in love.  

Had the-psychotic-bitch-publisher-from-hell mended her ways?

Does a rat look upon a pound of cheddar and ask, “How can I help this cheese become successful?”

No. She devours it.

Martha emailed and asked for $500 to list my book on her exclusive new bookselling website that “will rival Amazon”.

“No thanks,” I wrote back.

She did nothing to promote or sell the book. Instead she managed to piss off the printer and book distributors. She just couldn’t help herself.

But she did sell me copies at 50% off the cover price so I sold 500 copies on my own.

In 2001, when the FBI started calling and asking about Martha Ivery, this cheese packed it in. 

I told the FBI guy that Martha Ivery was a liar and a crazy bitch but I hadn’t paid her any money, she had in fact paid me, and she published my book.

He asked if I would be willing to sign an affidavit. “Some people are embarrassed to admit they paid her money to publish their books,” he added.

“Well I’m not embarrassed because I didn’t pay her to publish my book,” I said.

After I signed the affidavit, I wanted Martha and the FBI out of my life ASAP.

I asked for and received a signed release from her. I sold “Carly’s Ghost” to Zumaya Publications. In 2003, it was released in a 2-book anthology, with “Harpo Marx is Seeing Things”.

The new title, The Road to Weird says it all.

So there it is. The Worst Publisher On Earth discovered me.

Martha doesn’t deserve the Big House for what she did to me. But she pled guilty to the 17 counts against her. Evidently she ripped off a lot of writers. 

A friend – who’s not in the biz – asked if my career is tainted because of Martha’s reputation.

“Anything’s possible,” I replied.

When you’re knee deep in crap, you’re bound to get some on you. People have TOLD me that my association with Martha would hurt my career. So that means THEY believe it.

But I don’t have any control over the past. “I yam what I yam,” as Popeye says.

My friend then asked, “If you had it to do over again, would you walk away before the book was published?”

“Of course not.”

Publishing is a tough business. “It’s a Bunny-Eat-Bunny World” as editor and agent Olga Litowinksy coined it. In my own twisted way I’m glad I suffered through Martha’s de-bitch-ery and came out on the other side still clutching my advance and copies of “Carly’s Ghost”. It’s called paying my dues. It’s what writers do.

Now Martha is paying hers.

Click here to add From the Styx to your RSS reader.